Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
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