So drunk its hurt
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize
