honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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