So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
