I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
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