He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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