Where are you?
In a non slutty way
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Randomize
