I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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