my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize