I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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