Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
