"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Randomize
