We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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