Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I just want nice things and good sex
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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