my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
