you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
