you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
