I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
