During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
