All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
