But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
