He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I'm too high and old for this...
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
