I cannot find my penis.
I think I am morally bankrupt
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
