these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
