This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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