Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Randomize
