Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
