He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize