Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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