Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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