Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
