So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Ladies don't puke and tell
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
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