Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize