love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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