The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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