She's JV to your varsity
It's Friday. Sex?
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
its liver damage thursday
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
