Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
