absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize