Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
