Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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