Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
