But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize