Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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