dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
