I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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