He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
