We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
jump out the window naked night went bad
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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