If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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