I wannas sexs uuuuu
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
Randomize
