all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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